schizophrenia

All in all I'm coping pretty well, but I realize I've failed in my #1 priority: staying present. No big deal, though my body feels as tense as it ever has. Luckily, there's not a whole lot of emotional lading to go along with that, and tomorrow night, if I'm lucky, I'll get that massage that Jill owes me.

What's causing me to be of two minds is this: on March 7th, we're buying a house that we'll then fly 3000 miles away from the following day. I have to find someone to take care of the grounds until we can move in. I have to figure out where all pertinent information will be mailed until we move in. I have to open a bank account, as well as water and electric and propane service. My sister & husband will be "vacationing" in our new home the weekend before Easter, and will oversee the installation of the refrigerator and washer and dryer while she's there, if we can get it together to find what we want and order it. We'll be taking her air mattress, coffee maker and other sundries as checked baggage when we go to sign the papers. I'm finding myself kicking in to hostess mode even though I won't have lived in the house for even five minutes before she's there.

Our home isn't yet ready for market. I want it to be so by the end of the month. Which is next week. Four major things have to happen: 1) the sump drain situation has to be addressed. 2) the converted garage room has to be made to look like civilized people live here. 3) the family room carpet needs to be professionally cleaned. 4) the kitchen countertops need to be decrappified and polished.

There is a lot on my plate right now, involving finances, logistics, scheduling, you name it. I can't keep any of it straight. I'm excited and happy. I want to be done here. I want to be there. Nobody knows better than I do how crazy it is to wish time away, but I can't help it right now.